This has been a long time coming (1 day) but I think we need this implemented asap to prevent Afflack from ever becoming the least bit uber.

Here's my plan...

How to get points:
We all start out every night with 0 points.  Whenever someone makes a lewd comment they're given 4.6 pts (pts = points).  If the lewd comment involves Barbara Streisand then the individual is rewarded an additional 3.341 pts.  Mentioning Kundera's uberness equals a gain of 6 pts.  Making fun of Dominicide teens will get you 7.1 pts per remark (add +2 when involving Grow).  Other pts will be given out randomly based on booze and overall mood.

How to spend points:
When we come across a drop of a green or better item, we all pass and bid pts based on how badly we want the item.  Once everyone has decided how much they wish to bid, we immediately issue a /roll command.  If your name is Afflack or you're an alt / mule of Afflack, you automatically subtract 100 from the number you roll.  If your name is Kundera or an alt of Kundera then you're allowed to take the 100 pts that Afflack subtracted and add it to your roll.  Everyone else adds in the points they decided to bid on the item.  The Kundera with the most points gets the item.

I think that's easy enough.  Any and all questions can be forwarded to one of the "Yet to be Named Guild" Officers.

Okay well I have a problem with this.  I think that if you were not one of the special Founding Fathers, you should start out with neg. 10.09 points.  Remember who the REAL gamers are around here!  It was me, Bill, Roy, Liza, Dirtyhobaggery, and Rogueboyxx who made this guild what it is.  You guys are peons and are JELLUS.  We uber founders will all start out with 1k points. 
And because I am part Latina, I get an extra point for affirmative action.
All of you are just n00bs cuz you weren't around when me and Bill started the guild.  We can't hold your fucking hand through these raids.  FIGURE OUT how to FUCKING PLAY and I will give you points.

(okay I am back from masturbating)

Anyway, Afflack making a joke about his wang will garner plus 5 points. More, if it is dripping a substance. Ditsei getting hammered and making 80s songs references will also garner points. Extra if she let's Dirtyhobaggery lick her ta-tas. Afk to poo.

(okay I am back from pooping and I got a soda)

Meh. I am sick of all of you. Once we form the Alliance of UberHungHorses, we won't need you ANYWAYZ. So you can just say goodbye to MC and GOOD LUCK with your p.u.g.s, SUCKAHS!!!!!!1111!!!!

What about donkey shows? How many points do you get for mentioning/participating?

You both just made my day!!

What about rotation...

we rotating Ben around so we can all have a turn?

And when we're 'on-deck' for Ben, how many points do we get?

I don't believe I ever passed the conch on to any of you. You're ALL removed from Afflack rotation for 6 cycles!!!

NOOOO!!! I can't wait for 6 more cycles! I need that epic strap-on and ball-gag ASAP!!!

Gray, I told you where you stand right now. The epic strap-on will go to Roy because he is my cousin and he was at my HOUSE the day I STARTED this GUILD! He gets first choice, motherfucker!!!11
Afk to feed my rat some cheezits.
............
And furthermore, you can't do MC with me until you prove your worth. And if that means buying a plane ticket and flying out here to kiss my ass and make me top ramen for 3 days, well that is what you're going to have to do. You are a SHIT GAMER!!!!

Please dont tell me that stuff like this was/is happening in (whatever our guildname is)


Gray, I told you where you stand right now.  The epic strap-on will go to Roy because he is my cousin and he was at my HOUSE the day I STARTED this GUILD!  He gets first choice, motherfucker!!!11
Afk to feed my rat some cheezits.
............
And furthermore, you can't do MC with me until you prove your worth.  And if that means buying a plane ticket and flying out here to kiss my ass and make me top ramen for 3 days, well that is what you're going to have to do.  You are a SHIT GAMER!!!!

Basically, yeah.

Its 2 30 am. I just got home and I see this. Laughing my ass off, I will comment on you fuckers when sobriety sets in!

U will b blacklsted and i will roflcopterz!!11 Then i will ninja afflack wen u r not looking!!! LOLZ!

Bumping this because... it rules and our new folks should know how we roll.

I fail to see how this gets me any closer at all to my FUCKING PONY! I want a FUCKING PONY!!!! And don't EVEN think you will be able to give me that pony without the uber pink bows of awesome epicness....not even for a SECOND!!!!

FIFTY DKP FUCKING MINUS!!!!!!~~~~!!!

Oh, I love this guild so so much.
I think it is just about time to tell the tale of why we fled ZulJin like some fleeing things.
I will confer with Arolaide on how to make it max hilarity, as she is the one who cried the most when our guild was renamed... Serendipidy.

With a D.

Oh yes. Ing and I will work on drafting The Saga Of Us In MMORPGs And How We Eventually Stumbled On People Who Did Not Suck Like Hoovers .

It's kind of like a trainwreck. Or a Greek tragedy. Whichever.

Greek Trainwreck?

Lamb and feta were everywhere! It was horrible!

We wrapped the dead in grape leaves in an attempt to give them dignity!

"PUT THE PITA DOWN!"

This is by far the funniest post on any one of these boards. My co-workers keep looking at me - guess they think I'm laughing at them or I lost it. If I'm lucky they're thinking both.lol

VS's attempt at using a DKP system.

VS's attempt at using a DKP system.

Okay, from the FNG perspective, let me see if I've got this straight.

VS's attempt at a DKP-based system resulted in the following;

1) One member looking for a ball-gag and a strap-on

2) Another member complaining about a missing pretty pony, with pretty pink bows

3) Mention of a 'donkey show'. (Which.. may solve the mystery of #2 above)

4) A failed raid, screams of the dying, and an exploding lamb. Yet, there was feta, flatbread, and grape leaves at hand - so a nutritious lunch was had by all.

5) Lux, our fearless facemelting leader, needed some ..ah.. alone time, a grape soda, 3 days worth of Ramen, and a healthy shit. In roughly that order.

6) Something about an insurance selling duck??


Remind me to never be the first one to pass out at a VS gathering.

Remind me to never be the first one to pass out at a VS gathering.

Seriously.

And let that be a warning to you!