Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep.

Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there, I did not die.

Anon

~~~~

That's terrible.

That's terrible.

C'mon, the poem wasn't THAT bad.

I was waiting for that joke from the moment I hit reply.

:)

I just want to comment that I appreciate both the humour in the last two posts, and that really beautiful poem Beefy. Thanks guys.

:)

I just want to comment that I appreciate both the humour in the last two posts, and that really beautiful poem Beefy. Thanks guys.

The way I look at it is, if I was still making jokes when my mom passed, everyone else should get the same treatment. Candy was our friend and he wouldn't want us to quit being who we are. Having humor doesn't mean you don't feel a loss and often helps people laugh that otherwise wouldn't be able to.

In our family, we raise a glass and tell some jokes. That's the way we did it when they were with us, so that's how we will send them off too.

Thats how we do it in our family, and also in the military. There is a time and a place for honor and respect, and a time and a place for dark humor and letting off the tension; relieving the mood.

We live close to and come in contact with death on a nearly daily basis here. (thankfully most of it not our own) If we couldn't laugh about it, we'd go nuts.

The poem has been around for a long time and used at many of the funerals I have attended. The first time I heard it, was at my sister's funeral. It is an everlasting statement about life and death. Please give Candy's family my condolences and /hug

By the way, does anyone know what happened? Did he have health problems?

Just saw this post, my condolences for this tragedy. :(

Just saw this post, my condolences for this tragedy. :(

Yup Jack and I just got back from a week in the woods with no internet or even cell phone coverage.

So sorry to hear about Candy :(

... that is sad, He was a nice guy, may he RIP wherever he roam now . that does also shakes some recent feeling i had about another of our fellow that passed away too young. i know its natural not to live forever but tabarnac, 40 is way to fuckn young to go.

Garg

I did give Rob's sister the address for the site, so she may have already been here to see this thread. If not, I hope she does. It would warm her heart to see it and all the people touched by this loss.

Since Trianna asked... what I was told was simply health problems. He went to bed on a Friday night and did not wake up. It is somewhat comforting to know his passing was painless and peaceful.

It's very nice to see that in the fifteen months since I left VS, it hasn't changed a bit. You folks are wonderful!

I must log into the forums more often.... I'm so sorry to hear of this.... my deepest condolences to family and friends...

Slowman

Hi Guys,

This is Candylane's sister, I am sorry it has taken me so long to post something here. I dont even know where to start. I have watched this thread since Raps gave me the info and I have read each post. It does warm my heart to read the posts....to know how much you guys cared. I dont know if its healthy for me or not but I come to this page several times a day.....I miss him so much.

Robert was my big brother, protector, and friend. When we were kids, My brother could do no wrong, I thought he hung the moon. He was 8 years older than me so he got to do everything, but he always included me somehow, he would make me laugh when i was crying, he would hold my hand when I was scared, he would fight off the demons that only children see in the dark. Robert had the best sense of humor and would do anything to make you laugh....even doing funny voices and stuff just to get a smile out of ya. In fact he would probably be hacked off at me right now for feeling so upset that he's gone. I can see him sitting up in heaven telling Steve McNair(Tennessee Titan football player that passed almost the same day as him...which i think would also make him smile...he loved tennessee football)....WTH is she thinking...I will be here when her time comes....keeping a cloud warm for ya.

Now I must say that Robert Loved you guys....he loved WOW. In fact the last time I spoke to him, he urged me to play. (we both game, unlike the rest of the family....so i completely understood his obsession with the game) He was telling me about his characters and I could see his eyes light up, he could have talked about it forever. My biggest worry was that I would not be able to contact you guys, I didn't know his characters name and how to get in touch with you guys. I really worried about that for a couple of days, when Robert received a text from Raps. I called him and of course he probably thinks I am a nutcase because I was quite broken up when I spoke to him. I was so happy and relieved that he would let you guys know what happened. Rob had everything WOW....strategy guides, posters, soundtrack on his Ipod, pictures of hot little elvin chicks....which totally freaked my mom out, but made me laugh so hard....I guess what I am trying to say is thank you. Thank you for giving my brother friendship and kindness, he loved you guys.

Raps-Thank you for posting the thread and getting the word out.
Beefy-I loved the poem
Styg-Robert is laughing at you right now....
Brendar-laughing at you tooo.....:P
I can not go thru and thank each one of you personally but I have read and re-read this thread since the day Raps posted it and I thank you all for your kind words and thoughts. It brings me comfort and joy to see these posts.

The Final Flight

Don't grieve for me, for now I'm free,
I'm following the path God laid for me.
I took his hand when I heard his call,
I turned my back and left it all.

I could not stay another day,
To laugh, to love, to work, to play.
Tasks left undone must stay that way,
I've found that peace at the end of the day.

If my parting has left a void,
Then fill it with remembered joy.
A friendship shared, a laugh, a kiss,
Ah, yes, these things too I will miss.

Be not burdened with times of sorrow,
I wish you the sunshine of tomorrow.
My Life's been full, I savoured much,
Good friends, good times, a loved one' touch.

Perhaps my time seemed all too brief,
Don't lengthen it now with undue grief.
Lift up your heart and share with me,
God wanted me now, He set me free.

Author: Unknown

Kaloline,

I don't post personal stuff often. This is kind of a unique situation.

I lost my brother a couple of years ago. It was absolutely devastating to me and to my family, in a way that nothing else really is. Someone who is just an integral part of your life suddenly just....isn't, and there's no way to fill that gap. It's this horrible wrongness, and you have to somehow adapt...but how the hell do you adapt to a loss so profound?

It's not going to hit you at once. You think you hurt right now, and you do, but it's going to come in waves. The shock will wear off and more grief will come. And it hurts a lot. People will say that time heals, but it doesn't. I don't say that to scare you -- because you don't really want time to heal this, to make it go away or make you lose the memories that keep your brother alive for you. What time will do is give you the strength to learn to handle the hurt, so that the knowledge that he's gone is something you're able to carry...and that way you can remember the parts that make you smile without being overwhelmed by the things that make you cry.

Sometimes you're still going to cry. Years later, sometimes it'll still hit you and you'll cry. But that's okay, too. Because mostly, the memories will be happy ones.

For right now, be with your family. Be with the people who are also hurting, and who also loved Candylane and miss him. When you're hurting, tell them and let them comfort you. It'll make all of you closer, and you all need that right now. Help each other -- you'll be amazed at how much it ends up helping you. And whatever you do, don't shut off your own sorrow just because you know he wouldn't want to see you cry. You need to go on and get it out, and learn to grow stronger through the process.

I wish you and your family all the best, and I hope you come through this as well as you can. There's nothing easy about it, but know that all of his friends in WoW do care.

Kaloline,

I'm glad we're here for you. It's not much maybe, but it's something and sometimes that's all that it takes to get through the moment.

Kalo,

Candy and I were buds...we both used to keep odd hours; I remember how stoked he was when he got third shift. I only saw him at early morning and early evening after that; we used to try very strange things against boss mobs to see what would happen. The one thing that will always stand out with me was that he and I both decided that we wanted a 2hander out of Karazhan (big uber dungeon at the time) that our guild had looted and offered to those of us who did not raid (spend a long time in a dungeon killing things). Candy without a second thought told Fox (an officer in our guild) to give it to me...he did stuff like that a lot.

Candy was a Volunteers fan also...I am an Alabama fan as are a few of my guild buds RTR; many of the folks in the guild here are University of Memphis fans. Candy was always totally polite when it came to SEC sports (which is very hard) and I thoroughly enjoyed talking sports with him.

I will miss him a lot.

I read the post that you said that you were a gamer; yet you never have tried WoW. If you ever get an inkling to give it a whirl...please let us know. I think you would probably find a very welcoming home here, just like your brother did.