I know not all of us celebrate American Christmas, so for the Canadians in the group I wanted to fill you in about what this holiday means to us.

See, about 2000 years ago an old fat imortal called Claus met this young hot thing named Mary at her bachorlette party in the local pub.

After a few drinks, and a few more, and a few more... Mary took advantage of Claus. And well, she didn't much like protection and figured as long as Claus pulled out in time it would be ok. Well, either she was wrong, or he was too slow, but it didn't work and a few weeks later she realized she must be "With Child."

Well, as luck would have it, her fiance was into Opium. So she told him one morning that she would be having a holy child and then she slipped him some green dragon tea and sent him to bed. He magically woke up ok with the whole thing.

Turned out, though, that the Claus/Mary baby found quite a following because people gave him lots of gifts and then used it as an excuse to give lots more gifts to other people througout time.

There was one drawback,though. Claus was cursed by a vengeful god who doomed him to begin his search 2000 years later for a 21 year virgin in America to impregnate. So far he's turned up empty.

The moral of this story is.... oh, crap I forgot.

Well, apparently so did everyone else, I guess I'm going to hell, I hope I enjoy the company...


Happy Christmas Everyone!

Um?



Happy Canadian Christmas?


I'm going to get more wine.

Good idea Bren. I need more beer.

My 7-year-old was just given a huge makeup kit, and she's busily applying as much makeup as possible, very poorly. Soon she will look like a crackwhore. I have my camera ready.

You're gonna start her off by posting her on the interwebs for your imaginary friends? Give her a fighting chance man!!